i hate this
i hate the way i always think things are
and how i find out i'm dreaming
eager to come back to that spot i once was
to start feeling something again
so i hold on to the tiniest thing that appears
the first smile
the first gentle touch
and i keep fooling myself
my wishes become a non realistic interpretation of life
and i get lost 
everytime
in this game of hurting myself
while i wait for someone to emerge
it's almost funny to think 
how childish this is
this thoughts keep coming
and i lose my attention
craving to relish that flavor again.